iSafety in three easy steps
Sunday, May 1st, 2005
With the scorge of iPods ravaging our nation, I feel it’s my civic duty to educate my readers about basic iPod safety. To ensure your personal safety and the safety of those around you while using your iPod, please take the following three easy steps.
- Use larger headphones. Sure, white earbuds are hip, but big studio headphones are even cooler. The people around you will recognize your unwavering appreciation for sound quality, while also recognizing that you can’t hear a damn thing. You will be safe from others attempting to speak to you while at the same time securing your image as an uncompromising music lover.
- Practice sign language. Rather than removing your headphones in order to speak with others, try learning sign language. A practice well established by the deaf, sign language is an effective, widespread method for communicating without the use of hearing. Using sign language will enable you to order a triple mocha latte at Starbucks without interrupting the breakdown.
- Bling your iPod. iPod muggings have been taking place in major cities worldwide. It is of increasing importance that you keep your iPod visible at all times, not only by using it openly in the street, but also by dressing up your iPod in striking accessories. Some possibilities to consider include designer hoodies, an uber-yuppie fannie pack, a totebag with built-in speakers, or a glamorous floral printed case that makes it look like a Fifth Avenue clutch. Muggers will know better than to tread on your style.
By taking these three simple steps, you can enjoy your tunes in peace knowing that the world knows you’re a hip and unique individual who’s not to be reckoned with. Or spoken to.
Please tune in for my next round of safety tips: "How to Properly Enjoy DVDs and Playstation in the Comfort of Your Own Car".
With the scorge of iPods ravaging our nation, I feel it’s my civic duty to educate my readers about basic iPod safety. To ensure your personal safety and the safety of those around you while using your iPod, please take the following three easy steps.
- Use larger headphones. Sure, white earbuds are hip, but big studio headphones are even cooler. The people around you will recognize your unwavering appreciation for sound quality, while also recognizing that you can’t hear a damn thing. You will be safe from others attempting to speak to you while at the same time securing your image as an uncompromising music lover.
- Practice sign language. Rather than removing your headphones in order to speak with others, try learning sign language. A practice well established by the deaf, sign language is an effective, widespread method for communicating without the use of hearing. Using sign language will enable you to order a triple mocha latte at Starbucks without interrupting the breakdown.
- Bling your iPod. iPod muggings have been taking place in major cities worldwide. It is of increasing importance that you keep your iPod visible at all times, not only by using it openly in the street, but also by dressing up your iPod in striking accessories. Some possibilities to consider include designer hoodies, an uber-yuppie fannie pack, a totebag with built-in speakers, or a glamorous floral printed case that makes it look like a Fifth Avenue clutch. Muggers will know better than to tread on your style.
By taking these three simple steps, you can enjoy your tunes in peace knowing that the world knows you’re a hip and unique individual who’s not to be reckoned with. Or spoken to.
Please tune in for my next round of safety tips: "How to Properly Enjoy DVDs and Playstation in the Comfort of Your Own Car".
Here
I am writing about technology. You know, embryos with lasers in their navals
and oversized killer robots. Horrible impending doom and the like. Oh and
neat gadgets. Yeah, for sure.
